Eat. Drink. Be Married.

I got married. To a man I love so much that my heart swells with gratitude for God placing him in my life. A wonderful man, his wonderful family, and my wonderful family are now one family.

I have loved him for two years, and through all the initial communication problems, the COMPLETELY opposite personalities, and the misunderstandings over little things, we eventually settled into a routine of open communication, lots of love and affection, and lots of time on our own to be ourselves... "me time".

It works, man. I mean, it really works. I can't wait to experience life with him, have babies (yes, more than one) and continue to respect and love him more everyday.

Beans, Beans... Good for your heart

I decided to bite the bullet, swallow my pride and eat something I have never been able to stomach before. Beans.

Unacceptable for an amateur domestic goddess, right?

I was perusing my favorite recipe site, Kalyn's Kitchen, when I came across this yummy sounding recipe. (If you have never been to her website, she has scrumptious recipes, especially for people like me who are trying to follow the South Beach Diet). My fiance has been oh so patient with my aversion to beans for the past 2 years, so I thought... why not? I will eat just about anything... squid, gizzards, etc... so why am I so afraid of some beans? Needless to say, there are not very many beans in this dish, only one can. And they are black beans, which to me may be the least offensive. My problem has always been the texture... too grainy, too sandy, just doesn't feel right in my mouth. Shudder.

So, on with the experiment. I started by sweating out a finely chopped onion. I love onions. The smell of them cooking, especially with some garlic, makes me very happy. After they had become soft, I added three cups of organic chicken stock and a tablespoon each of cumin and chili powder. A dash of garlic powder and I was soon simmering away:

The aroma was quite nice, I was liking this already! (Yes I know - I haven't added the beans yet)

After simmering for about 10 minutes I added 2 cups of chopped uncooked chicken breasts and one can of black beans. It was done. If I hated the dish, I certainly was not going to eat around all of those beans!

While the pot simmered happily away, I chopped the fresh cilantro I bought earlier at Publix (sadly, I was not able to get myself down to the farmer's market this morning), and added two tablespoons of lime juice.









It was almost time, I said to myself, taking a deep breath. I'm sure all you bean lovers out there think I am a pansy for being scared of my measly little black bean "accentuated" soup - but this was quite a leap for me. And Al is quite proud, even if he did make fun of me for the lack of beans.

Here's the finished dish.












I sat down in the armchair, after deciding the kitchen table was too formal, and took a bite of my soup.

And then I took another.

Why these beans weren't bean-like at all! They were creamy, not sandy. The dollop of plain Greek yogurt I put on top made this taste like a yummy Mexican stew - tasty, spicy and full of amazing flavors.

I am glad I tried this experiment. I plan on reheating the leftovers for lunch tomorrow. And I just may foray into black bean burgers.

Just don't think I will be doing anything with black-eyed peas or lima beans anytime soon. Yuck!

balance shmalance

This whole "keeping my life in balance" thing is harder than it looks. I am great at making plans, creating lists, and detailing everything I need to do to get my goals accomplished. But when it comes to following them through... man I am lazy!

Here's a picture of one of my two sweet dogs, Cooper. They make me feel... a little less lazy :)

eat, pray, love

I'm kicking my life up a notch.

There are so many things I want to change about myself... weight, housekeeping habits, financial responsibility, complaining. But I can only do so much. Upon reading the book Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert I find myself making a conscious decision to start my changes from the inside out, instead of hoping that external changes will make me happy.

Eat:
Lately I have been noticing a trend in myself, as well as in society moving towards "clean eating". My definition of clean eating is consuming things that will make a positive impact, whether it is on the world, the community or my body and spirit. I can't even go to Publix and buy the "grown in Mexico" tomatoes because I think of all the thousands of dollars and carbons wasted in getting it to Alabama. Purchasing local food is woderful. Growing your own is even better, if not as easy. In Birmingham we have a huge farmers market that sells any in-season fruit or vegetable you want, MOSTLY grown within a 100 mile radius of Birmingham. The back section is an exception, as a lot of the produce comes from further away. Just look for the out of state license tags.

If I am unable to get it local, I am buying organic. I have noticed a taste explosion when i compare organic to non-organic. Especially the free-range, vegetarian eggs and the 2% milk that tastes like whole milk! Unfortunately with the masses moving more towards organic, government laws on what is considered Organic are becoming less strict. This way more factories and non-family farms can claim to be "natural, preservative and pesticide free" but not really be such thing. And remember, Whole Foods has a wonderful policy for the farmers they purchase from. They are against cruelty, preservatives and pro-free-range. It may be expensive, but to me it is worth it.

I love cooking for friends and family. I love cooking for Allen. I even made collard greens last night, a process which took over an hour to cook! Silly me, I thought collards were like spinach - only 5 minutes to wilt and serve :) But it was delicious. With local potatoes it was divine.

Pray:
This is a doozy for me. I have moved so far past the Southern ideal that you have to be a "member of a church and give them your first 10% and not live in sin, and not oogle your hot neighbor or you will go to hell" mentality. I believe that God is everywhere and he lives in everyone of us, whether we are Christian, Buddhist or Muslim.

Unfortunately organized religion likes to make up it's own rules, and some are deadly. People find comfort in following the familiar, and having structure. Some don't. I choose to believe in a bigger God. The one who made us with the ability to love, laugh, make mistakes and see beauty in the smallest thing. The one who opens my eyes on a random day running errands to see the leaves changing colors, hear the beat of my own heart, or regret the fact that I didn't let someone in front of me in who had their blinker on. The one who made our Earth millions of years ago. The one who has the power to take it away.

When I asked my parents as a child "where does God live?", I was told He lived in Heaven. Mighty nice place. I believe in a heaven. I also believe that a child should be taught that God lives in your heart, in the streams, in the mountains and the tides. He lives in your morning coffee, in your conscious and in the air that the entire world breathes.

Praying shouldn't be a penance, a punishment or a request for a new car. I want to pray more. But I want to put my old thoughts of how I should pray out of my mind. I want to meditate on God, ask him to look into me and help untangle my mess of stress and anxiety so i can see with clearer eyes. I want to learn to be calm in His presence, knowing He will make it possible for me to be a part of the world in a loving and more open, less critical and less self-flagellating way. This will be a lifelong endeavor, and I may go weeks or years trying to be in control of my life. But I am not. I look forward to this chapter.

Love:
I need love. I crave it. I need affection and reassurance. I need to give love as well to feel complete. This is an eternal process. I need to fall in love with myself again, quit focusing on the negatives, and find what I have inside me that I love and other people love. This is so sensitive for me. I focus so much on the negative, when all I need to do is accept that I am not the center of the universe. I do not need to be in control. I want the love to come out of me, pushing the bad thoughts and negative feelings of self-worth away. i am not that important. I mean, I am that important, but what is the point of bemoaning every little thing? Tell me that!

Anyways, I know this is a long post. And as I write it I worry about what people will think when they read it. Will they think I have lost my mind? Will they think I don't make any sense, or haven't researched enough? Why do I care?

I will work on that today: being my sometimes flaky, but always earnest self and not caring if people think I am a wacko ;)

Adios

How I saved the world today

This morning found me up bright and early. So early in fact that the sun had not yet risen. Allen and I donned our jeans and t-shirts and headed to the farmers market.

if you haven't been to the farmers market on Finley Avenue, it is worth visiting, even in cold weather! Row upon row of beautiful, colorful local fruits and vegetables. We even picked up some homemade cane sugar syrup made in Mississippi for Al's dad. I walked through the aisles, making my decisions carefully. These choices have to last us at least a week or 2, you know.

We ended up with 10 yellow squash, 8 vine tomatoes, 10 sweet potatoes, 20 red potatoes, a massive sack of collard greens a jar of syrup, 2 red apples, and a pound of unshelled pecans for $20. You can't beat that with any supermarket stick!

Tonight I will make baked salmon, homemade collard greens and roasted sweet potatoes. A meal that is 2/3 local is better than everything being shipped from California, right?

It sure flies....

Man... where did the time go. I looked at my last entry in October - that was nearly 5 months ago! A lot has happened since then.


I read Julie and Julia - a tale of a married woman who decided to tackle all of Julia Childs' recipes in Mastering the Art of French Cooking in one year. Inspired me to be more experimental in my own cooking.







I read Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver (on loan from Amanda Lane). This book has so far changed my life. The term "locavore" was voted word of the year in 2007. I understand the appeal. Growing your own food, as well as eating and purchasing food from local farms and stores keeps the petroleum industry at its heels, strengthens your community's economy, and is so much better for your body. The slow-food movement is really sparking a fire in me to be more environmentally responsible, and more respectful on my body and what I put into it.




I read Super Natural Foods, a gloriously beautiful book that outlines ways to incorporate natural foods into your diet. Never again will I buy "enriched" white flour, now that I know that all the good stuff has been stripped out and the remaining endosperm is bleached... with BLEACH. I will use the laast of my granulated sugar and sweet n' low and start using more natural sweetners such as raw cane sugar and honey. It will be expensive, but I think my.. um... "voluptuous" .. ahem... body... can handle the moderation.





Allen and I have been attending the Financial Peace Seminar with Dave Ramsey. I have learned SO MUCH about our finances. After about 3 classes we were able to sit down and budget our lives for the next few months. We were spending close to $1,000 a month on eating out, beer and stupid things!!! With a more managable budget, we can still have the things we want AND pay off ALL OUR DEBTS in under a year!!! I can't imagine how good that will feel!!!


Allen and I have finally gotten the marraige talk out in the open. Our communication issues are mostly about me not wanting to nag or burden him, and him not wanting to say anything that will make me defensive. After a couple weeks worth of talks, I believe we have reached a good solid footing in our relationship and in our communication with each other. The confusion and frustration I felt in October is over!


I will clean the emotional, financial and physical clutter out of my life. It is a long and hard road, but one I am really happy to be on!!